ComPost Live with Alexandra Petri

Jun 12, 2018

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Live chat with Alexandra Petri at 11 a.m. ET. Submit questions and comments for her to respond to now.

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Connect on Twitter: @petridishes And catch up with the blog here!

Hello, all! I'm back!!

I had to chat about Solo in the politics chat, like some kinda stinkin' nerf herder!

OH NO! I am sorry that you encountered this sad fate!

1) We need to talk about the droid moral dilemma that has now been let out of the box!

2) What did you think generally?

Welcome back to the most important people in your life, your chatters. Obviously.

Hello friends!!! I missed you! Does anyone need a free online code for the Post? I was trying to think of a good apology gift, but as I have established in many prior chats, gifts are so far from being my love language that if I gave someone flowers in the 18th century it would probably have ended our relationship. 

Gone without a goodbye or explanation! Did you fall down a wormhole to another dimension? Glad you are back.

The other dimension was just like ours but everyone had beards, and the Federation was an Empire. (I'm glad to be back!) 

We missed you! We were wondering if we'd ever see you again. We were wondering if you had gone out for cigarettes, and it was our fault. Also, I saw Solo over the weekend, and quite liked it, even though, because I am old now, I didn't catch everything that was said and I didn't understand everything that happened. I liked the dude who played Solo, and Glover was excellent as Lando, and I liked a lot of the other new characters. Was it necessary? No, but it was fun. I can't figure out why it's been a flop, except that maybe it's become too much Star Wars, all the time.

I also enjoyed it, although the experience was somewhat marred by the fact that I saw it in 4D in a theater that bounced and pummeled you and squirted you with water and flashed lights at you to try to accompany the action onscreen, and just made me feel seasick. But I thought it was on the whole an enjoyable and, as you say, fun but not necessary movie. I do agree with what Alyssa said about how they made every possible universe-shrinking choice -- my favorite favorite (SPOILERS FOLLOW) Completely Unnecessary Tie-In to the Originals was when someone mentioned that there was a mining colony and Lando said, I think verbatim, "Boy, I'd hate to be the administrator of a mining facility!" and then sort of looked camera-ward. 

Have you met Alyssa's baby yet?

No!!! My fiance has, though. He reports that she is the most excellent of babies and has been gifted by the fairies with all good gifts, though there may be some sort of spindle situation we'll have to work out 16 years from now. 

Yeah, but while you were gone Canada and Western Europe became our enemies and our main allies are apparently now Russia and North Korea. And FYI - I've had the beard for nearly 40 years.

*pounds frantically on portal* HOW DO I GET BACK


how was your time away? did you miss your chatters with your whole heart?

I did! I held no other chatters before them! 

Spoiler alert here. Did you the Darth Maul appearance make sense to you? It seemed wrong to me, just in terms of the timeline. Further reading tells me that in the books or TV shows (which I have not read or seen) he somehow survived being killed by Obi-Wan. But where do he and the Game of Thrones lady go from here? (They were clearly setting up a sequel, but I'm guessing that's unlikely to happen now.)

It made literally no sense to me! I knew from Clone Wars that he survived his fall, but I didn't know that they thought people who *hadn't* watched Clone Wars would have this information! It seemed like just another example of how the movie, given the option of introducing a new world or piece of surprising information that did not in some way tie in to what had gone before, or making even a strange and convoluted choice that linked back to the previous films, went with the second one every time! But at that point I was just thrilled to get to stop bouncing!

I asked my wife and she said she'd think about it and I'm a bit concerned because TODAY'S THE DAY.

Well keep the chat posted! And happy birthday! We still need you although I cannot speak for the feeding!

That dude with four arms who was in Woody Harrelson's crew, and Lando's droid co-pilot/droid liberator.


Oh yes and what's his name, whom I keep calling the Charismatic Megafauna because I've forgotten his actual name! He was charismatic and seemed to have some sort of wookiee fetish!

You just got a shout-out on The 1A this hour for your satirical abilities, as Joshua Johnson interviews "Wait Wait, Don't Tell Me" host Peter Sagal.

Did you know that when Paul Simon turned 64, Paul McCartney telephoned him and sang the song to Simon?

I did not know that, but that's delightful! 

That reminds me, did you see the Tony Awards, which included a number from "Sponge Bob Square Pants" where the title character dances with four legs? So clever!

I've heard very good things about SpongeBob in general! But (astoundingly for my Brand and also my general ethos) I failed to watch the Tony's this year. But, also I guess on Brand, it was because we were too engrossed in wedding planning. 

So it was just a documentary about fish and they sprayed a little water at the place they assumed your face was when some fish (or maybe they were dolfins? I think it was flying fish) did some splashy things and the chairs shook a few times when the boat the camera was on was going over some waves, and that was about it. I think that is about the right amount of extras. Shaking, etc. all through an action movie would be a drag. And the one really cool thing, they can't do. You don't get to feel being pushed into your chair during acceleration, so why bother?

I concur! This sounds exactly like the right level. 

I think she and the droid from Rogue One would be a lot of fun together.

I concur! Also, it just occurred to me that they are alphabetically and numerically (wait, is there a word that combines both of those words? too late; I have already typed them both!) next to one another -- K2, L3. If they make another spinoff, good odds we'll have an M4 on our hands!

I don't know whether you're aware, but the usual depiction of that spindle is actually a distaff.

Congratulations. You are only one year from being able to participate in a single payer health system as an American. That should be ample joy for reaching this day. If your wife needed you and fed you yesterday, I don't think that you have anything to worry about. That is a young person's song for when 64 seems very far away. But seriously, congrats on being close to Medicare. That is great.

When I get older gaining my care

Many years from now...

Run to Bethesda to see The Legend of Georgia McBride. It is fantastic. I went twice. I never do that.

Wow, the elusive TWICE LIVE! 

Why is Woody Harrelson in EVERYTHING! Seriously. I mean, he does a decent job and he has an interesting face, but it is like every time they need someone who isn't classically handsome, they call him up and offer him so much money that he never, ever says, "I'd rather take a vacation." I'm not sure why.

I think he's a good actor who is more than just Not Classically Handsome but he is going through a McConnaissance-like period of ubiquity. But as long as you are one of those actors people are never like, "Oh, not Name again!" I guess you keep postponing vacation.

These onlines shenanigans are working. I think I'm going to try their hamburger.

There is method to their madness! I just hope it doesn't give Burger King ideas. 


One Scaramucci away! 

Here is a nice link to all the musical numbers from the Tony Awards, including the Sponge Bob/Squidward four legs tap dance mentioned here on chat. P.S. The number from RENT by the kids from Marjory Stoneman Douglas drama program is heart rending

Or a prequel?

That's a good question! I think a stand-alone in the same universe, although that may not be for some months. 

But she's a wonderful cook. I'll feed myself as long as she's cooking.

Have you not seen Burger King's tweet? What are you, planning a wedding or something?

I was the one who called it a "reliable beige sofa" in Amber Phillips' chat. Maybe I was hard on it. I liked the bug guy, too (Rio?). SPOILER: So the rebellion was fueled / ignited by a guy who ends up marrying the most important rebel general EVER? That's like those regency romances where everyone "just happens to meet" the prince regent. Harumph! Harumph, I say!

HARRUMPH indeed!

As someone who spends too much time thinking and worry about hair (because I dislike mine but can't figure out how to improve it), I kept wondering why his character's hair was so lopsided, and how he wasn't annoyed by that.

I'm reading it right now, its a book with 12 chapters-each focusing on a different sort of apprenticeship -set in 18th century England. Not particularly funny, but I keep thinking you would enjoy it. I'm learning a lot about the particulars of the various trades.

Is this one of those things you thought was about the Trump era and then got too deep into to finish? Because I support it either way! 

I saw it by myself.

Ha! And on that note, I am off! But I will be back in force next week! See you then and catch you on twitter (@petridishes) and the blog ( in the interim! 

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Alexandra Petri
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